testing...

Somewhere, you but me...

Where are you to understand me,
to believe me,
to hear me
I want you to be alot like me

I think that I want you
to feel you
to be near you
I want me to you be you

I never know if that's the case
or if I want is the chase
is it love or knowledge
that any relationship will benifit me
because, I feel I'm missing it

I want to grow
and learn
and experence
because that is life for me
experence...

Maybe you
will find me
and I'll learn about you
and even more about me,
you and me, somewhere?
______________________________________

I've noticed how I never bring this up but since this is my actions and secrets I figure I should do it now, but mostly because I feel like it. It's been intresting latly because It's not that I feel alone. Or that I should be with someone. But I do feel as if I want someone. It's almost as if I want to experence it now, because I havn't experenced it right now. And when I think about it, experencing that, lust or love or whatever it ends up being...even fun. I think that I want it because I can grow from it. That it could create love and fun and life for me. That if I have that I might change into somthing I want to be. That I can't become that intill I do find tat someone, anyone. It's not that I want a "true love" or even "the love". Or even if it is love, because I doubt it's love that I am certain about looking for. But I am looking for it.

Then it makes me think about what would it be. What are they. Why did I want this person in the first place. There is no one I know that I really see myself as "growing" or "experencing" that I want to. Mostly because I like some qualities in some people, but there are some qualities about them I really truly don't like. Or maybe it's not the qualities I don't like, but the qualities they don't have. This actualy comes from people who are young... But that doesn't mean age, at all. I don't know anyone in my school, or my life that I see myself. I guess it comes down to the fact I'm looking for some as intellegent and ingenious as myself. Who would go to the concert and revolutionize and passionate and powerfull. But like I said, not someone, but anyone.

Maybe, OldManRivers, could test out letting down some requirments. Maybe I will see how that works. We'll see.